The February sun, rising toward spring, warmed my face – just as the cold winds of winter struggled at my back. They say March comes in like a lion. If that is true, then March is here early. We’ve had Wind advisories for the last two days, and any step outside warrants a firm grip and solid stance to avoid the unladylike acrobatics that precede the tumble that I’ve been able to avoid this winter.
Walking Diesel, we both held out noses high in the early spring air, he sniffing for the latest passage of one of the neighborhood dogs, while I imagined green and growing things filling the air with hope.
I have a lot of hope this year. Something amazing has happened to my attitude. Generally a dark and moody old lady, I have found a renewed sense of life. Nothing exotic or frenetic; zen might be a better way to describe it. If you recall, I mentioned painting my bedroom a couple of weeks ago. I painted it a lovely shade of Mocha Rose.
Now this might not seem odd to the average reader, but I am not a pink person by any stretch of the imagination. Black? Yep. Dark greens and browns? Uh-huh. But never pink. Until now. It’s amazing to me, and stupendous to my daughters and friends. The room has taken on a glow of cream and rose, quilts on the bed, gently flowered drapes and soft green rugs. Sounds lovely, doesn’t it? And, why am I talking about it? Because I feel really light, which translates to feeling peaceful and good about life in general.
The last two months have been spent using the sun and moon’s energy of the Cleansing Tide to clean my house. I have cleaned out closets and drawers, basement and garage, desk and hard drive. I have also washed walls that weren’t freshly painted, washed windows, cleaned carpets and hardwoods. And during all that, I have been working on cleaning out the Inner house. My spiritual life has been in hibernation for a while and required some airing out. I do my best thinking when I’m busy, so I scrubbed and painted and considered what was feeding my soul and what was holding me back. When I tossed the sweeper bag into the trash, I focused on tossing out the outdated concepts of my relationship with Divinity. The Goddess has it together, it was me that was dragging my feet in the mud.
I can never thank my dearest friend enough for saying to me: “Maybe you need to see the light in Her face, and focus on that.” It made me realize (once again, thank you very much) that we always have a choice. The world is not black or white but multicolored, rich in texture and gloriously grand. It’s all a matter of focus, and my focus has been in the shadows for a very long time.
Awareness is everything. Hiding behind pain and fear does nothing but create more pain and fear, and I deserve better. We all deserve better. It can be easy to forget the moments of joy that are ours by birthright. So my lesson is this. Don’t forget to watch what is happening around you. If your house is cluttered, it is reflecting something back to you; an Inner state of mind that might not be healthy. If the job stinks, there may be some hint that you are not following your heart. And if you feel lonely and unloved, could it be that you don’t love yourself?
This post is about the direct relationship between the outer and inner worlds. As above, so below reflects the concept that ‘as goes the universe, so goes our own little world.’ Ultimately, the only thing that means anything is love. Love yourself, and the world is yours.